Relationship Problems: Rekindling the Romance, Part I

One of the most common relationship problems couples complain of is the lack of romance in their relationship. Laura and I have faced this problem too. Like many things in life we take for granted, love and romance is one of them. We get so busy with our lives that we hardly notice. What we found is that you don’t always know it’s a problem until the romance and passion is gone.

The great thing about this relationship problem is that it is easily solved. You just need to do the things that you did when you first started dating each other. “But, that was easy back then, we didn’t have kids, or careers to manage.” Look, you were busy back then too. You just made the time, and made each other a priority. If it’s important to you, you will make the time. The following are some basic things you can do to bring back that spark and rekindle the romance.

1. Having a romantic getaway is a great way of rekindling the romance in your relationship. This will help both of you to forget about the daily stress of life and to focus on each other. Laura and I took a trip to a State Park and spent the day walking and talking on the trails. It was beautiful to see all the nature and get back to basics. We felt so close to each other. Plus, no kids to interrupt! We all need that type of activity to recharge our “emotional batteries.” Couples especially need it to help them reconnect, maintain their relationship as a priority, and remember why they fell in love in the first place.

2. Another effective way of rekindling the romance is to simply start treating your sweetheart with respect. It’s easy to forget this one. But, think about it for a moment. How many times do you treat total strangers or acquaintances with more respect than your partner? You open up the door for little old ladies, or let a pretty lady go first in line at the grocery store.

What’s up with that? I think men are more prone to this one. We think once we’ve “won” the girl we don’t have to work as hard (or not at all) to keep our woman happy. Try a little kindness and respect with your sweetie. Let her go first, or choose an activity she would like. You might just find a little more romance creeping back into your life.

3. Rekindling the romance can also get a jump start from trying something different, or exciting. It doesn’t have to be an extreme sport such as skydiving or surfing. Maybe you could try golfing or bowling together. If sports aren’t your thing, you might try camping or mountain climbing. Ballroom dancing is also enjoying resurgence in popularity for couples. Find out what is exciting to your sweetie and explore it together. It might be exhilarating for you too, and help you both to reconnect and begin to rekindle your passion.

4. Another great way of rekindling the romance is to hold your sweetie’s hand. There is something so basic, so elemental about connecting with each other by this simple, yet profound act. It’s like two magnets being pulled together. I remember so vividly when I held Laura’s hand for the first time. I swear there was some kind of chemical reaction when we held hands together. It was like magic. Heck, we hadn’t even kissed yet and she had me. We still enjoy that connection when we take walks, or just sitting down together.

5. Rekindling the romance in your relationship can get even better if you plan and participate in regular date nights. Planning is important because it lets her know you put some thought into it. Dress up and take her some place nice. Surprise her and buy her a new dress for the occasion.

Have the child care arrangements already in place, dinner reservations made, and maybe a concert or movie tickets already in hand. Show her that you’re the man with the plan. Ladies love it when a man is prepared. Your preparations will make you appear confident. Women love confident men. You don’t always need to spend a lot of money, just put some thought into it. Maybe have some flowers waiting at the restaurant, or a special card that you have made for her. Can you feel the fires of romance getting hotter? I sure can.

Well, we’re half way there. So, start practicing these five and stay tuned for Part II of Relationship Problems: Rekindling the Romance.

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